You never found me Not saying you didn't try We were near each other I did my best to hide The part of me I wanted you to see It's lonely in the dark, but oddly comfortable The longer that I stay here, the less I feel the pull And the light outside And in your sparkle eyes I thought about leaving But where do people go?

I've heard several theories No one really knows The sight I hear There's regret in letting go Well, my name is Justin Landis, and I live in Sandpoint, Idaho.

Not too far from Spokane, where KSPS is.

And I've been playing music for probably four decades in one capacity or another.

I don't play as often as I'd like to.

And I play more often than I could be.

So.

To dream and dream of better things ahead To wake and feel the sting of what's been said You trying to tell me everything was fine The weight of what is not was on my mind I've seen a flower in bloom only to die I watched his sparkle vanish from your eye Another day to rise and be not dead I dreamed a dream of better things ahead Took a trip to ease our troubled hearts Laid awake surrounded by the dark The morning did not bring a welcome end To what the song darkness did portend Ive seen a flower bloom only to die And wondered at its fruitlessness have I Another day to rise and be not dead I dreamed a dream of better things ahead Homeward bound and lost among the reeds Soaking wet cold and shivering And as the ground grew firmer underfoot I took the time to notice where I stood I saw a flower bloomed but not yet dead Evergreens that towered over overhead Another day to rise and not be dead I dreamed a dream of better things The future and the frailty of men Becomes the past for all of us and then I wonder if this brokenness can mend And maybe the parade can finally end Ive seen a flower bloom only to die Ive watched an ember sparkle back to life Another day I rose and was not dead I dreamed a dream of better things ahead My inspiration for music is, it's a language that I'm familiar with.

That is I can express things differently than I can in speaking.

The older I get, the more subjective language feels, and the harder it feels to be like communicate in a way that's clear and that I feel understood.

The lyrical nature of music, plus the tonality, is enough abstraction from spoken word that I still get to use words, which is great and that's part of it.

But another part is the tonality.

Another part is the rhyme scheme, or lack thereof.

I've tried not to play music a few times in my life, and I've never been able to stay away long.

It's it is coming out one way or the other.

One of my favorite things about making music, playing music, making things in general, is just trying things that I maybe haven't done or trying things that are, I don't know, whatever, just trying new things and seeing how they go.

So this one has this.

This vocal processor, which is fun for me.

Anyway, This is called “Leaves are singing”.

Couldnt tell what you were thinking so I had to burn it down We could spend the day not drinking See what that does for us now Monarchs tower in the distance The waves laugh at our feet As we dance among the forest Hear the singing in the leaves What am I missing?

When I feel so sad The music is playing The song is a craft Now I am tired of fighting But still I return What am I missing?

When will I learn?

When I saw that you were angry I retreated into night And the words that we werent saying They didn't sit with us right But we don't go to bed angry Talk it through till it's done When we move to love's rhythm There ain't no reason to run What am I missing?

When I feel so sad The music is playing The song is a craft Now I am tired of fighting But still I return What am I missing?

When will I learn?

What am I missing?

When I feel so sad The music is playing The song is the craft Now I am tired of fighting But still I return But what am I missing?

When will I learn?

Oh, what am I missing?

When will I learn?

Music has always been in my family, and my parents both sang in like, church choirs.

So I was constantly singing.

I was the kid known for singing in the bathroom at school and stuff.

And when I was 15, I got an acoustic guitar.

Was living in China, actually, and a part of this little, like, house church.

There was a guy who played acoustic guitar and songs for us to sing to, and I thought it was cool.

So I got an acoustic guitar for 15 bucks at one of the corner stores and started learning chords.

He taught me a few chords, and it's been all downhill from there.

We saw what we knew we could be We were that potential Time was a construct only the horizon was all we could sing We were too young to know what we knew We've doubted it ever since How can one trust in love with its amorphous shape, its dangerous promise?

Time has weight as waves do Never plan to carry so heavy and incessant I'm a shadow of memory We were too young to know what we knew We've doubted it ever since How can one trust in love with its amorphous shape, its dangerous promise?

We were too young to know what we knew We've doubted it ever since How can one trust in love with its amorphous shape, its dangerous promise?

Its dangerous promise Its dangerous promise It's a big, wide world out there.

There's a lot of different perspectives and we're all doing our best to make things and make a living and have a family and make a difference.

Be kind and plan on.

Give somebody the benefit of the doubt that you hope they give you.

That as much as you're doing your best, they probably are too.

Every line begins with, I And still I try Making such a mocker-eye All the reasons why Close the door and lock it from inside Open up and shed the mantle of my pride They don't always have to know what's on my mind Omission?

Well, that's just me being kind Valleys deep and rivers wide Filling up with time In suppress He over I Not exactly lying Close the door and lock it from inside Open up and shed the mantle of my pride They don't always have to know what's on my mind Omission?

Well, that's just me being kind Close the door and lock it from inside Open up and shed the mantle of my pride They don't always have to know what's on my mind Omission?

Well, that's just me being kind This next song I wrote for my daughter.

Life moved on.

And everybody grows up.

And then new things come to light.

And you realize maybe things weren't all what they seemed to me.

So this is about processing through that.

It's called “Proof”.

I don't want to tell you the truth I don't want to be the proof that this world and this life can be a real tricky mother Plus, it's hard to find the words In my head they all sound so absurd They sound like excuses and whining and never accepting what's real and what's true And then moving through it I love you more than I'm able I know that dont really make sense But sometimes for a sec I can see through my limitations But I'm stuck with them for now I'll keep trying to figure it out But I won't do anything for you There's so much I cannot do for you There's so much I cannot do Period.

Because I'm stuck in me- I wanna tell you everything But I know what sorrow it brings With the time that I've had I could have done so much better And I think that part of it's esoteric You have to believe better so you can bear it But there's a way to avoid setting a ceiling or getting trapped in a box I love you more than I'm able I know that don't really make sense, But sometimes, nonetheless, I can see through my limitations And I love you so much I know my mindset is a crutch But it's there, it's true, it's real Just like the feelings that you and I feel And the best thing now that I can do is listen And hope the sheen on you never stops glistening Yeah Hear more from the artists on this program on the Inland Sessions podcast.

Available now at ksps.org/podcasts